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Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Consent And Unconsent: News of the Bondage-y


Awwww, what a cute couple! Image source: mug shots, found on Gawker.

This news has made the rounds of the blogs and news sites. Seems a witless young Portland couple (see above) celebrated Valentine's Day by enacting a bondage fantasy, driving around with the woman naked, gagged and bound in the back seat of their Subaru.

They were, of course, spotted by a good citizen who turned their license plate number in to the police, thinking that a kidnapping was in progress. Nine police cars responded to the report. ("You say a beautiful naked woman tied up in the back of a Subaru? I'm SO on it, chief!")

The two were booked (see pics) and charged with misdemeanor disorderly conduct, which has since been reduced to a violation. What they should have been charged with is being kids, though they are putative adults, because really, the thought that comes into my mind when I read this story is, "Look, kids, it's all well and good playing sexy bondage games in private, but when you go around in public with your girlfriend bound and gagged, people don't have the ability to read your alleged minds, so they have to take into account the possibility that you are a for-real scumbag who is committing an actual kidnapping, see? Now cut it out and don't ever do anything like this again, or I'll have you up on charges of felonious stupidity!"

Which brings us to our next story. A Texas man (natch, Texas) kidnapped a woman and raped and tortured her over a period of 12 days before police figured out he had her, and arrested him. Found the story on MS-NBC.com. Apparently, the woman is a former neighbor of the man, who rejected his advances at some point.

Instead of finding some other woman to court, he kidnapped her, chained her up, gagged her, caged her, raped her and tortured her over a period of 12 days, without so much as a by-your-leave from her.

Police questioned him on why he did it, and he said he did not really know, but did admit to having some bondage fantasies. Well, duh!

What police SHOULD have been asking his is another set of questions: "What made you think it was OK to kidnap this woman? When did you stop thinking of her as a human being deserving of the same respect you yourself would like? Why did you think it was OK to ignore this woman's cries of "NO! NO! NO!"?" Did you think once you had raped and tortured her enough she would magically be OK with it?"

Because these are the really telling questions in a case like this. Bondage fantasies, as the Internet will attest, are quite common, but the people who think they can act out those fantasies on others whether they consent to it or not are atypical, and getting at the heart of that atypicality is a lot more likely to lead to results than just figuring out that a guy who acts out bondage fantasies has bondage fantasies.

But perhaps the saddest part of the report is the fact that they bothered to note that the man was a vice-President of the local Kiwanis Club. (Kiwanis Clubs are basically a club for business types that focuses on service projects for helping children, presumably poor ones. It's also a way for business types to do some networking, ka-ching!) A Kiwanis Club vice president! Why, that has to be one of the most totally irrelevant facts ever presented in a news report!


It's a no-no unless you get the yes! yes! first. Image source: Hogtied.com.

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