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Monday, August 13, 2012

50 Shades of Weird, Part Lebenty Million


Hooooney ... come on upstairs, I'm in the bedrooom ... I've been reading Fifty Shades of Graaaaaaay ..." Image source: Hogtied.com.

Time for another post covering all the weird, fun and funny things that 50 Shades of Gray is popping out of the culture like toast from a toaster -- a toaster running on the unbridled sexuality of mommies!

To get off to a refreshing start of weirdness, here's a story of how the novel Fifty Shades of Gray saved the small town of Millinocket, Maine.

The Forbes.com UK site has a really NASTY critique of the British literary establishment's generally stupid and short-sighted response to the success of Fifty Shades of Gray, which was basically the equivalent of monocle-dropping followed by extreme harrumphing and tut-tutting that such a smutty and poorly written novel should have achieved such success. In short, the usual stupidity. Writer Cecilia Rodriguez argues that it's just the usual traditional sexism, with the literary establishment belatedly discovering that the vast majority of books are bought by women, and that they buy books that are written that spark THEIR interest, not some middle-aged literature major's interests. Let's get our tiniest violins out and play them a tiny little song, shall we?

Well what's more likely to get a horny soccer mom up all bright-eyed and buzzy-tailed than the Little Rooster Alarm Clock Vibrator? Worn inside the panties but outside the body, the Little Rooster starts out with gentle vibrations but has 30 different levels of power to step up to, until Mom wakes up with her buzz on. Mom will be SURE to get her kids to soccer practice no matter HOW early it is, and do it with a smile on her face. Maybe a little bit of a flush, too.

Dublin, Ireland, will be hosting the "Fifty Shades of Bliss" sex festival, a Fifty Shades of Gray inspired event that will feature generally sex-positive events and lectures and some good old-fashioned BDSM training. Ireland, traditionally mired deep in religion-inspired guilt and shame about sex, has found the runaway success of Fifty Shades to be a great way to get the public discourse going on topics sexual in ways that do not involved priests shaming young people into not having sex, or having sex with the young people themselves.

Aaaand while we're on the topic of Irleand, the Fashion.ie website has an article on kinky fun 50 Shades of Gray style that features pictures of comely colleens in ropes and love cuffs and lingerie.

Will there be more weirdness and fun ahead from 50 Shades of Gray? How could there not?

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