Here's lookin' at you!

She was a charming and incredibly flexible woman but he never could get used to the way she could twist her neck like that.

Image source is Roxanne Rae (face) Lauren Phillips (butt) and Derek Pierce (cock) from kink.com shoot 40171.

Rich Bitch, Prison Bitch Trilogy Picked Up By Hillmark Productions As Part of Sassy Prison Rape TV Series Aimed At Young Adult Viewers

 
by: Pat Powers

Special to: Hollywood Inside Scoop

April 1, 2025

“Why not rape?” asked Hillmark Senior Vice President in Charge of Acquisitions Cherry Sassoon as I sat with her and discussed the new Hillmark series based on my semi-incredible “Prison Bitch Trilogy.” “That was the question that always hovered over the table when we had discussions about what new properties to pick up. We knew we were doing a fine job of covering the market for insipid, almost humorless romcoms. And we’ve got the romantic cozy mystery market sewed up, too.

“But we also knew that there was a huge market out there for rape erotica, bondage erotica, incest erotica and bestiality erotica that we were underserving, in the sense of not serving them at all, in any way,” Sassoon continued.

“Isn’t serving those markets mostly illegal?” I asked.

“Not in the purely legal sense,” said Sassoon. “The only porn that’s straight up illegal is the underage stuff. Hillmark will never touch that market, because our own viewers would tear us limb from limb if we tried.”

“That does sound awful,” I observed painfully.

“Oh, it was… I mean, it would be,” said Sassoon. “Anyway, we decided that the most popular way to go was rape. There were all sorts of good reasons for this. About 70 million of them, in fact.”

“Seventy million?” I asked. “Where did you get that number?”

“That’s the number of copies of “Fifty Shades of Gray” sold worldwide in its first YEAR of release,” said Sassoon.

“But Fifty Shades of Gray isn’t about rape, it’s about a consensual BDSM relationship,” I said.

“Oh, that’s just tedious rapey-wapey timey wimey stuff,” said Sassoon. “Rape, BDSM, bondage, romance, they’re all pretty much the same. You say potayto, I say puhtato. The old timey romance writers knew the truth of it.”

“All right, I’ll bite,” I said. “How is romance the same as rape? It would seem to be the complete opposite.”

“No, rape is the ultimate in romance,” said Sassoon. “The old time romance writers had a subgenre called “bodice rippers” which were basically historical rape romance stories. The male MC, typically a pirate or a sheik, kidnaps a proper English or American woman and is so overwhelmed by her beauty and grace and charm or whatever that he rapes her. Then they make up and fall in love and he apologizes to her and rapes her some more and then proposes marriage and they both live rapily ever after.”

“But I wrote the “Prison Bitch” trilogy, god help me, and there are no romantic rapes at all in it,” I said. “All the rapists were psychopaths and sociopaths of various stripes.”

“Oh yeah? What about that Paul guy at the end?” Sassoon asked. “He is supposed to be very romantic.”

“He’s not a rapist, he’s a consensual lover, very big on safewords and so forth,” I said. “Did you even read the books?”

“Of course not, that’s why you hire English majors, women with no lives, to read stuff so I don’t have to. They condensed the trilogy into this one sheet of paper here,” Sassoon said, holding up a battered, stained piece of paper with a few paragraphs typed on it. “This kind of time-saving is why I’m an executive. Plus having the wit to see the romance behind all the rape.”

“So, the rape story is going to become a romance, I see,” I said. “Any other intriguing changes to the story in the books?”

“Oh, yes indeed,” said Sassoon. “We’re thinking we need to pull back on the whole rich bitch storyline. What with all the Luigi stuff that’s happened in real life, it’s kind of obvious that our readership may not be in the market for stories about wealthy people unless it’s a fall from grace type story. So we’re thinking of having Kim be a welder or a beautician or something.”

“But “Rich Bitch, Prison Bitch” IS a fall from grace story,” I said. “It’s right there in the title. Kim starts out a rich bitch and winds up a prison bitch in every sense of the word. She goes from shady banker and party girl to everyone’s favorite rape victim. You can’t have a bigger fall from grace!”

“Sure, there’s a fall from grace of sorts in there, I suppose,” said Sassoon. “But it’s not enough of a fall to make up for her early wealth in these days. So that is not happening. She’s a welder, or a sassy waitress like AOC, something like that. And she get picked up for shoplifting milk for someone else’s baby, and goes to jail and gets raped because, of course, she’s a beautiful welder. Well, ex-welder.”

“And how is the rape going to be handled?” I asked, dreading the answer.

“Two ways,” said Sassoon. “We have two markets here, older readers who want to recapture the gauzy pleasures of old-time bodice ripper romances, and more modern readers who are down to watch fucking. For the older readers we’ll have a version where, as soon as they get past the chaste kissing stage, which basically is as soon as the sex starts, we’ll cut away to a visual metaphor. Like maybe a pillow tightly wrapped in rope being poked repeatedly with an eggplant with sexy moaning and grunting in the background. Something along those lines.”

“Sounds boffo to me,” I said agreeably. “What about younger viewers?”

Oh, we’ll give them a long, steamy erotic buildup lots of near-nudity and some full nudity, but no genitals, you know, and no genitals in action,” said Sassoon. “I mean, they will do some fucking, but only R-rated stuff, you won’t see tab A going into Slot B nor any of the other slots. And what you do see won't last too long.”

“How do you plan to tie her up?” I asked.

“Well, about that…” said Sassoon. “We where thinking maybe a blindfold would do the trick for delivering the kinky.”

“Mr. Sassoon, the people who read my book read it BECAUSE of all the bondage and rape, not despite it,” I said. “They wanted those extreme sexual bondage scenes, they enjoy them. If you back off from the sexual bondage they are not going to stick around for the story, riveting though it is. You’re not going to get those seventy million viewers you wanted.”

“Well maybe not seventy million,” Sassoon agreed. “But we’ll get quite a few. While I’m sure your readers enjoyed your books, my summary of Fifty Shades of Gray indicates it was pretty damn tame.”

“Oh, it was, I read it,” I said. “Eight chapters until they got around to kissing, very tame indeed. But when they did get down to it, they got down to it big time. She was cuffed, blindfolded, tied up and being fucked in the movie. And the movie had very, very good box office.”

“Ah,” said Sassoon. I could see the dollar signs flashing in her otherwise empty eyes. “That’s a very good point. Can’t let censors destroy artistic qualities, now can we?”

“You’d be surprised how much the sort of people who read my books care about artistic qualities,” I observed.

“The summary does say your books are full of artistic qualities,” said Sassoon, nodding sagely.

“My readers wouldn’t have it any other way,” I said.

Note: the day after the interview with Cherry I received a call from Hillmark’s HIP (Hot Intellectual Properties) department head. She explained to me that Hillmark had chosen the script based on my story to be converted into the first story in a brand new series about a coven of detective witches who try to change the bad reputation of witches by solving crimes and doing good deeds using their special powers. Also, a giant spider will be a regular character in the show. They’ll start by rescuing the inmates of Brookhaven Prison from Club Rape. This will necessitate further changes in the script, but I am assured that the spirit of the story will be fully served, whatever that means.

I’m so glad I got my check in advance!