I'm trapped here! If I move at all, these shackles and this collar will fall off!" Slave-A-Licous slavegirls from "Slavegirls From Beyond Infinity" the B-movie with the best title of any interstellar slavegirl movie evah!
I am really excited about my next novel and I want to tell you about it RIGHT NOW, that's how excited I am about it. I have for a long time not talked about upcoming projects because I felt that people who talk about the stuff they are GONNA write are often not writers ... just wannabes. But with 30 stories and books published, I feel that I am due some cred on the topic of stuff I'm gonna write. Besides, it's probably a good idea to tell people about your upcoming projects ... what do they call it? ... marketing, yeah!
So a few years ago I wrote a review of the movie "Slavegirls From Beyond Infinity." And in that review, I said the following:
And for all its faults, Slavegirls From Beyond Infinity is an actual movie -- it's not porn. It's just that -- it COULD have been one hell of a movie. If the movie's creators just followed through on the storyline they'd developed during the first five minutes of the movie, they'd have had a real hit.
The story of two desperate, half-naked slave girls trying to escape their captivity with interstellar slavers/cops/whatever on their tails would be a topnotch movie. If they'd just bothered to make the movie that naturally follows from the opening five minutes instead of morphing it into a remake of The Most Dangerous Game, they could have had a HELL of a movie that WOULD be remembered as a topnotch B-movie.
Because as absurd as the first five minute storyline is, this is about the best slave girls-of-the-future storyline ever. It offers so many intriguing questions for the connoisseur: Why are interstellar spacecraft transporting half naked slave girls across the galaxy? Are they part of some interstellar slaving operation? Or did these two women do something really horrible to merit such treatment? Maybe there's a political element -- they're rebels captured by the bad guys and enslaved and transported to another world to work as sex slaves. Or maybe the crews of some interstellar craft routinely grab a few slave girls to make the long voyage between planets less dull.
There are all sorts of intriguing scenarios here, all sorts of great adventure possible as the slave girls flee their relentless pursuers, but we don't get that. And I, well, I don't know why the people who made this movie didn't get it. But they sure didn't.
So I was casting about for a new story to write. It had to be something I would really be interested in writing. I have written a couple of stories just to work within Amazon's limits and draw a large portion of Amazon's readership, and it was hard as hell. I'M not interested in dull stories of happy consensual sex even if it does involve bondage, I want there to be danger and excitement for the characters as well as hot sexual bondage scenes.
And at some point, I started thinking about "Slavegirls From Beyond Infinity" and what a great movie it would have been if it had stayed with the premises of its original scenes and not turned into a tired and poorly done remake of the Most Dangerous Game. If it had only been a galactic space opera with two sexy, scantily clad slavegirls at its center, it would have been HUGE fun.
And that's when I had the idea: I should write that story, the one that had fired my imagination over the first five or ten minutes of the movie. The story I had WANTED to see, and had missed terribly when the movie dissolved into mush.
THAT will be my next project. I'm fired up about the prospect of writing it. And I know I will write it, because by damn, I want to READ it. And I want it to be GREAT FUN and sexy as HELL. And I KNOW I can do it.
And the question I will leave my readers with is: why would a culture capable of interstellar travel need slavegirls? Couldn't they clone them? Build female androids to function as slavegirls as in my Love Slave Robot War stories)? Come on, both those technologies are MUCH simpler and close than FTL interstellar travel. I'm looking for a good, convincing answer. I have a few in mind already, but I have not settled on any just yet. What would make human slave girls a desirable enough item to transport between the stars, other than their hottitude? I'm listening ...