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Monday, January 27, 2020

Why Did I Write A Parody Of the EarthCent Ambassador Series?

So, my new novelette, "Late Nights At Onion Station" is a parody of the EarthCent Ambassador series by I.M. Foner.

I have not done any parodies before, though it's very clear I like humor and I read a LOT. Almost all of my stories have been completely original works, no fannish stuff among them. I have my own stories to tell, thankyewverymuch, and although I've taken some humorous jabs at this and that, I've never outright parodied anything.

And like most parodists, I'm a fan of what I'm parodying. I've read and enjoyed the entire EarthCent Ambassador series. But the definition of “parody” explains why I did it: “a parody targets or mimics an original work to make a point.” And I wrote “Late Nights At Onion Station” to make a point about something that bothered me about the original work: its libertarianism. I'm more of a socialist.

The libertarianism in the Earthcent Ambassador series is very subtle, well buried in the story. But once you see it, you can't unsee it: the EarthCent Ambassador series is a pure libertarian fantasy at heart. There are little clues: the protagonist, despite being the chief representative of humans on Union Station, is paid very little money, so little that she lives in a slummy area of the human sector of Union Station and has to save up money to buy a comfy chair.

Why is she paid so little despite her important government position? Because she's a government official, of course, and government is not important in libertarian fantasy land. While the protagonist of Union Station makes so little money that the food at diplomatic receptions is an important part of her diet, all her friends and acquaintances who are independent businesspeople make huge amounts of money from their activities. They can't do anything at all without making huge piles of money. Because they're independent entrepreneurs, you see: the good guys.

As a socialist, this was annoying, but what was REALLY annoying was the usual libertarian obliviousness to the fate of those who don't work out well in his paradise. This is in face my major problem with libertarianism in general: their focus is always on those who succeed in libertarian society, with a general feeling that almost anyone can succeed if you put forth a little effort, gosh darn it!

Most libertarians, in fact, have little or no interest in what happens to those who don't do well in their libertarian fantasy. Often you get a sense that they would be fine with people who aren't good bargainers in the free and open markets starving to death and dying, that they would happily kick their bodies aside on their way to the bank.

You can see this by the way libertarian authors focus on the successes in their stories and ignore the losers. The successful entrepreneurs who make scads of money and get loads of power in their lives are the FUN part of the libertarian fantasy. Of course that's who gets all the attention in a libertarian story.

But if you don't pay attention to what happens to all the other people in your society, you're basically building a hell on Earth, and honestly, that's what I think most libertarians are doing. They don't WANT to create a hell on Earth, any more than the original Communists wanted to create the Soviet Union from Imperial Russia, but as the Soviet Union demonstrated (and China) if you're at all sloppy in thinking about how you get to your paradise, you can so very, very easily wind up with a dictatorship or an oligarchy that commits crimes against humanity without so much as blinking.

And libertarians are even worse than Communists in this respect. They really, really don't want to deal seriously with the hard part of their fantasy, which is how do you handle the people who don't do so well in the free and open marketplace? The phrase “ideological blinders” was invented for this phenomenon. Libertarians are like architects who want to build a skyscraper that will truly scrape the clouds, but have little or no interest in building a solid foundation.

The problem is, when you look at any group of human beings statistically, for almost any set of abilities and skills, including success in business, if you graph the results it forms a bell curve, with the bulk of people falling in the middle of the curve, and a considerable portion (half, even!) falling on the wrong side of the halfway mark. That being the case, you need to ensure that your system, whatever it is, provides a decent standard of living to the people who fall on that wrong side, not just the lucky winners.
Just assuming that everyone will magically be above average in a libertarian scheme is ridiculous, but a lot of libertarians do just that.

I think the reason that libertarians aren't willing to address the “ground floor” issues is that it may require making an exception to their rule that every problem can be solved by the invisible hand of an unfettered marketplace.

It might require some crude actions like taxing the very rich and successful (the beneficiaries of the invisible hand) at higher rates to fund housing, food and medical care for the poor. It might require, in short, some form of socialism.

It's time to call the belief that the invisible hand of the marketplace can solve all social problems and allow people to live free of government of any kind what it is: magical thinking.

And that's what really bugs me about libertarians, that they let this magical thinking fuck them up time and time again, because you know, if they took the time and effort to work out how a libertarian society could help the losers in the marketplace, they might just have a robust ideology that could compete successfully with democratic socialism.

But they can't, they won't and they don't, and so they remain a fringe, though a markedly more successful fringe than their ideology deserves, because many parts of it (the economic parts) dovetail very nicely with traditional conservatism.

And so you have many, many science fiction books written with this profoundly dumb, magical thinking, wish fulfillment hoo-ha presented as a wonderful basis for a society to exist on.

I found a very nice way to dramatize the problems with libertarianism in the story. I also manage to point out how adherence to libertarian principles makes one inherently blind to the suffering of others. And I ramped it all up to 11, to make it funny. And by damn, it IS funny. Some of the best humor comes from annoyance. I hope you enjoy it.

Friday, January 24, 2020

Somebody Has Written A Parody of "Date Night On Union Station" and I'm Pretty Sure It Was Me


If you LOVED Date Night On Union Station (Book 1 of the EarthCent Ambassador series) you'll LOVE Late Nights On Onion Station the sexy, sexy parody of "Date Night on Union Station" written by the infamous Pat Powers, author of Crazy Aunts and Scary Uncles and Jenkie Jenkins, Interstellar Sex Reporter.

Onion Station lies in the outermost reaches of human-explored space, a gigantic artifact created by the alien Zuks, artificial intelligences that are so badly programmed that they are extreme libertarians. They run Onion Station with a fine disregard for safety, comfort and well-being of the various alien species that dwell in their station, including the humans.

But it's the beings who live in Onion Station that make it the unique, exciting and strange place that it is, and when the Earth Ambassador to Onion Station starts dating an actual human man (much to her mother's relief) everything changes on Onion Station. This simple act of dating will bring together a fascinating group of characters:

Kitty Reinhardt, the human ambassador to Onion Station, is totally dedicated to her work. She earns the 25 cents an hour that the tight-fisted Zuks pay her the hard way, i.e., attending diplomatic receptions and helping Earth firms negotiate trade deals with the many other alien races in Zuk space. She's proud of what she does for humans in her role as ambassador (but it is too bad about the starving people who die regularly in the lower corridors of the human sector of Onion Station). But it's her relationship with her more than just comfortable chair that is a source of deep shame to her, even though she's not at all guilty about her taste for kinky maledom/femsub bondage sex.

Mike Bonus, the trader with a heart of gold who buys the contracts of starving humans by the dozens on the cheap at Onion Station and sells them off to slave traders on crapsack worlds for a fat profit – and who is revered as a saint by the humans whose contracts he sells.

Kitty Reinhardt's chair, which seems sentient to Kitty, given that it converses with her and does things to her that previously were confined to safely nonsentient machines like vibrators -- but which the Zuks SWEAR is not sentient.

The Sisters of Mercy, who rescue starving humans crawling through the mean corridors of Union Station ... but whom many starvelings would describe as anything BUT merciful.

Dweezil the Dreddarian, a six-limbed otterlike alien with a sharp eye for info-trading and a very commercial approach to friendship.

The Fringe, treelike aliens who have a taste for Earth epiphytes to hang in their canopies.

And the Zuks, the artificial intelligences who run Onion Station and live in fear of the massive artificial intelligence that runs the station itself, because it's definitely one of your more godlike artificial intelligences, and it's just as benevolent as the Zuks who created it.

But most of all, you'll have fun, and lots of it, as a favorite series is parodied senseless by someone who has read and enjoyed every book in the series.

What can I say, I'm a sucker for space opera!

So go ahead, dig in already. And if you have not read "Date Night on Union Station" go ahead, get over there, dig in, you'll enjoy it! The whole series is on Kindle Unlimited! It's sexless, but it's fun. And "Late Nights On Onion Station" well, it provides all the kinky sex an adult mind needs to ... adult ... and it's ALSO on Kindle Unlimited!

Monday, January 6, 2020

Two Great Books About Feminists On Alternate Worlds

So, I noticed that Annalee Newitz, one of the founders of IO9, has written a science fiction novel about feminists engaged in a war with misogynists over control of their timeline. Feminists on alternate worlds, gee, sounds familiar ... wonder where I've encountered that before? Oh, right, I just wrote a book with the exact same theme (though a very different approach).

Of course, Annalee Newitz is someone with a little name recognition, and her book is being published by a traditional publisher with all sorts of marketing clout, whereas I am an unknown outside a circle of deeply disturbed fans (Go, fans!) an indie publisher whose only marketing clout is his wits, which is to say, virtually none.

So I decided to emulate traditional publishers and hitch my wagon to a star! (I mean, really, I don't know HOW many publishers announced that THEIR darling's latest magnum opus romance with just barely enough kink to it to even be noticeable was "The Next Fifty Shades of Gray." But I know it was practically all of them.)

So here's my latest publicity effort for my books. Note that I am promoting Newitz's book, too. Just bein' a stand-up guy:

Have you read The Future of Another Timeline by Annalee Newitz? (Sadly, not availabe on KU) It's about a group of brave feminists at war misognyists to control their timeline, protecting womankind from a future that makes “The Handmaid's Tale” look like a picnic.
Want another book about feminists on alternate worlds? Try The Visitor From Incel World by Barry Anderson, which is totally available on KU!
Thanks to Barry Anderson, you don't have to wait for Ms. Newitz to get around to writing a sequel. In “The Visitor From Incel World,” Ariana Heppelwhite, a gender studies grad student at Lacy Swanson Women's College, is caught in the aftermath of a physics experiment gone wrong and catapulted into another world, which she names Collar World because all the women in it run around naked except for their collars. And their cuffs. And their shackles.
Ariana finds this an alarming sort of world, and a confusing world. And the inhabitants feel the same way about her, with her tales of crazed incel rapist wannabes everywhere and child armies and constant warfare and sex and money being intertwined. Earth, which they named Incel World in honor of its bizarre sexual practices, frightens them. They fear invasion by the barbaric hordes of Incel World, and some of them, being very logical, decide that they should kill Ariana so she can't return to Incel World and tell them about Collar World!
Will Ariana survive? Can she change Collar World by teaching the women of Collar World how great it is to be equals with men in all things? And what about the surprisingly appealing incel (a phrase she ever expected to use) she met back in Bayport?
Only one way to find out: get the book … it's free on Kindle Unlimited. And if you haven't read “The Future of Another Timeline by Newitz, get it, too. You can't have too much mind-bending SF.