Sunday, September 30, 2012

Water Break For Justine Joli

Just another day on the set of 50 Shades of Gray. Image source: Behind Kink.

Ok, wer'e kidding here. That's Felicia Day celebrity clone and geek girl hottie Justine Joli in a behind the scenes shot of the site "Behind Kink." Miss Jolie is getting a water break in the midst of a grueling dildo bondage scene for one of Kink's sites, probably It's a surprisingly hot image, Jolie so naked, helpless and bound, having to have the water glass raised to her lips while she drinks, the dildo still invading her pussy.

The Behind Kink site gives you images and videos of what goes into the making of's various adult videos. Even though I liked this particular photo, I'm not sure what the attraction is here, maybe it's the porn industry's equivalent of the glamor profiles they used to do of movie stars or the promos of of movies they did in the old Hollywood studio days. Except of course, visitors pay specifically to see this content. Well, I guess I can chalk it up to the vagaries of Rule 34.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

A Job Skill I Did Not Even Know I Had

It's a good thing you can't see what's behind the yellow blob, because ... because ... well, just BECAUSE! Image source: Sex and

The guys at Rocket News 24 website found a fascinating ad, for guys to put video mosaics over women's genitals in Japanese adult videos. The firm seeking the censorship artiste is Soft On Demand, which creates such classics as "Lunchbreak Rooftop Bondage with Female Co-Workers." It's clearly a dream job for some ... focusing right in on those throbbing body parts and mosaicing them out so OTHERS can't focus in on them.

Clearly, in my pathetic attempts to keep this blog from being XXX or something like it by covering up male genitals with yellow blobs, I am ALREADY qualified to do this job. But I have no interest in it. It's a PITA enough to censor out the genitals here. Especially with that stupid dick-waggling Black Label ad negating all my efforts. The life of a blogger is no easy one, but I imagine being a full-time censor would be even worse.

Friday, September 28, 2012

Strippers versus Werewolves and Bondage Prison

"What does a girl have to do to get into a place like this?" Image source: Sex and Submission.

The folks in Toronto REALLY know how to do double feature. According to the Blogto blog, a local cinema is running a Fright Night double feature that includes "Strippers vs. Werewolves" and "Bondage Prison." Sounds like a night of good, cheesy fun! Now is there any bondage, much less sexual bondage, to be seen in the film "Bondage Prison?" My every last instinct says "No." I've watched quite a few women in prison films hoping for bondage, and with a few notable exceptions, it's all lesbianism, catfights shower scenes, body cavity inspections and forced prostitution/stripping, with precious little in the way of bondage.

What's more, my experience of exploitation films titles in general is that if the title advertises a particular fantasy, you'll find precious little of it in the film. (See my piece on the general lack of busty actresses in the films "Busty Actresses" and "Busty Models.") So "Bondage Prison" has two strikes against it.

Still, it's the only women in prison flick to ever MENTION bondage outside of porn, so ... could be some there. I dunno. One can only hope. And in the meantime, "Strippers versus Werewolves" scores on the title ALONE. And it might even have strippers and werewolves in it.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Anastasia Steele: Woman of the Year?

Coming sooner than you think! Image source: bondagette: Magazine cover: Time Magazine.

Came across an image in the Brit tabloid "The Sun" that looks like it came straight out of a bondage porn site. Check it out here. I've not seen anything this sexy, nakedy and kinky in a publication that was not a laddie mag. Naked, blindfolded, her breasts covered by nothing more than a strip of tape ... that is one hot bondagette there. Wow! Another indication that kink is being mainstreamed.

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Fifty Shades of Grey: Suitable for Television Only?

When's the last time you ever saw this in a mainstream movie? Never? Thought so! Image source:

Another heartening sign that the people are smarter than the media comes from an article on, which asks the question, "'Fifty Shades of Grey' Movie: Too Kinky for Film? Fans Rather See Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey on TV Show, HBO Series'.

Hell, yeah! Sometimes you see indie movies that do sexually challenging stuff right, but mainstream movie makers almost never get it right. They always tone the sexy way down. With 50 million in sales, the book clearly has huge potential to be either a monster movie a la "Gone with the Wind" or a franchise a la Star Wars. The studio heads are going to be so hot to protect their monster movie's profit potential that they are going to absolutely avoid doing anything too risky.

Remember the hash they made of "9 1/2 Weeks"? Of "Exit to Eden?" The only reason they didn't fuck up "Story of O" is that it was done by the French. So the odds on a good movie version of Fifty Shades? Low, man, way fucking low.

TV cable channels like HBO and Spartacus, however ... different story. They have got some kickass writers and producers who have proven that they know how to handle the raunchy. Game of Thrones and Spartacus are some of the hottest mainstream sexual imagery going right now, combined with topnotch dramatic stories. This would be the best shot Fifty Shades has at a good film adaptation, but it's not happening. Going to be a freaking movie. And almost certainly, a fucking failure.

We shall see.

Vidcap from an episode of the Starz cable channel series "Spartacus: Vengeance." Yep, the Starz people could flat-out HANDLE the raunch in Fifty Shades of Gray.

Monday, September 24, 2012

Fifty Shades of the Big 12

Ride 'em, cowgirl! Image source: Sex and

With football season well under way, I thought some of you might enjoy this link, a parody of Big 12 football as written by Anastasia Steele. Enjoy! Also, in the same vein, a parody of Big 12 football as written by Cormac McCarthy. I don't even follow Big 12 football, but these parodies had me cracking up. Good fun!

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Guido Crepax: Getting Mainstreamed

A panel from Guido Crepax's graphic novel version of The Story of O. Image source: Flavorwire. You can get The Story of O and other Crepax works on Amazon, but they are freaking expensive. I have seen some listed as low as $20 but I would say, "buyer beware."

The flying monkeys, bless their leathery little hearts, brought in an interesting article on Guido Crepax. The article itself is a worth a read but the part I found most interesting was where the flying monkeys found it: the Comics Alliance website.

The Comics Alliance website deals with comics of all sorts, but it gives a lot of attention to DC and Marvel comics, in addition to webcomics, and also has no problem with dealing with adult comics like Crepax's work. Batman and Superman are commonplace topics, but Fetishman has shown up as well. And Guido Crepax.

Now if you'll read the article you will find many references to Crepax's powerful visual style, etc., the way he was one of the first to really use page frames in a different and unique way to tell his story. And that's true. But his title is "Bianca Fails As Bondage Porn" which admits that much of the appeal of Crepax's work is its bondage element. And he's right about the power of Crepax's work. But only partly. And he's wrong about Bianca failing as porn.

You can see why in the panel from Crepax's Story of O that leads off this article. Crepax absolutely minimized the text in his stories, a good thing for us English readers because he is French and his characters' text speech is French. In this particular panel there's no actual speech, just muffled groans and screams, as all of his characters are gagged.

Speech is also not very necessary because the characters in his stories barely relate to each other, their eyes are out of focus in some middle ground almost always, even as they speak to one another. They all appear to be engaged in internal reveries, even when they're talking to each other. Which they don't do all that often.

The thing is, you can see Crepax's talent in that Story of O panel ... the images are raunchy and yet filled with erotic tension. Look at the hands on the woman being branded, even if he did not include text to show she is screaming, you would know how she is responding to being branded. And the way the woman's lips twist around the gag. And the way the other woman's eyes are so intense over her panel gag. And the way the weight of the woman's butt sags against the tight leather straps that hold the dildo plug in her ass. All done with just pen and ink.

Being forced to stick to the narrative structure of The Story of O helps overcome Crepax's great weakness as a storyteller. His skill as an artist and visual storyteller is like having a powerful sports care capable of moving at great speed, turning on a dime and braking to a halt in a second ... but as a storyteller, he drives that sports car like it's a clown car. He's all over the place. The guys has a weakness for dream imagery, which DOES give him freedom to use his powerful abilities as an artist, but the narrative splinters and fractures and you're left with a story that is no story, just a succession of images. Which is kinda what "Bianca" looks like.

And on a personal level, I find his style of drawing faces kinda repulsive at times. Take the face in the upper left of the Story of O panel. I THINK what Crepax was going for was a French fashion model look with wispy fine hair and a delicate face. But what I get from it is an older woman with sunken eyes, sunken cheeks, very tired, and just not that interested in the proceedings. Not erotic at a all.

Furthermore, the "lion tamer" frames in Bianca ... as a guy who likes bondage imagery ... they work JUST FINE as bondage porn, thankyewverymuch.

And the great thing here is, I can have this discussion about Crepax's work based on an article on a mainstream site and have it be about Crepax's style and technique as a storyteller and artist and not have it be only about the BONDAGE BONDAGE BONDAGE BONDAGE just because a lot of his work contains bondage imagery. Bondage may well be mainstreaming, and that's a good thing. Being able to talk reasonably about things instead of being overcome by the sex fear hysteria common among social conservatives (see this post for some great examples) will make us all mentally healthier.

The group has a site called The Training of O that has some very nice bondage imagery too. Quite possibly inspired by the Story of O. By the way, that's Ksenia Solo clone Ashphyxia Noir hanging in those ropes and getting her brains trained out.

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Apologies For A Big Swinging Dick

I apologize for all the dick-waggling going on in the Black Label ad at the top of the page. At the same time, I have to point out, it's hilarious. Apparently there's a simple tip, a bit of advice, that will add inches to your dick, and they'll tell you if you just click on the link. Who knew? Reminds me of one of my get rich quick schemes: run an ad saying: "Teach your gagged slaves to stop drooling -- one dollar!" Then when they respond, I mail them my advice: "Teach 'em to spit!"

Friday, September 21, 2012

Slave Girl Birthday Cake

Guess which slave girl is the birthday girl? Image source: Public

Slave girls gets to wear their cake, and eat it too! Off each other's butts, but hey, that's slavegirling for ya!

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Marie Claire: Mainstream Media Continues to Just Not Get Fifty Shades

"Well this is public, but I'm not sure it's revolutionary." Image source: Public

The Autralian edition of Marie Claire Magazine's website is asking, "Has Kinky Gone Mainstream?" referring of course to the way 50 Shades of Gray has steamrollered its way into public consciousness via selling 50 million copies.

They ask in that lame, timid way that mainstream magazine articles typically do, "Has kink become mainstream?" Then they refer to a few experts, quote a few random people they know, and go on to draw some safe-sounding conclusions about not following the crowd and doing kinky stuff just because that's what's fashionable, and instead exploring what YOU want to do (or not do) is the key to have a fulfilling sex life. The painfully obvious disguised as wisdom.

And when they are not engaging in a festival of "Duh!" they are getting it wrong:

But is this anything new? “Nobody is reinventing anything. It’s all been done but differently,” says Dr Morrissey. “Think the Marquis de Sade’s The 120 Days Of Sodom written in 1785, Pauline Réage’s Story Of O in 1954, right through to Nancy’s Friday’s My Secret Garden: Women’s Sexual Fantasies in 1973. What’s revolutionary is the fact that it’s so public.

No, that's not what's so revolutionary about 50 Shades. It's the fact that it's MOMMY porn, not Daddy porn. It's a demographic that has never been associated with porn of any kind, and now they're going for kinky sex. THAT'S revolutionary! If GUYS had taken up some porny book big-time, if them mainstream even noticed, they would dislike it, thinking "Horny guys getting kinky, can't be a good thing."

But since it's mommies it IS revolutionary, which is why Marie Claire have no idea how to respond to it, and really don't "get" it. Really revolutionary stuff has a way of being hard to figure out.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Carla Gugino to Get Kinky on The New Girl: They Do It All Wrong, Of Course

A tasty example of maledom-femsub sex from Sex and Submission. Not shown: femdom/malesub sex. Why: because I don't think my readers want to see it.

The flying monkeys brought in a little semi-non 50 Shades of Gray news this week, a post on the Cinema Blend website that announced in breathless tones that Carla Gugino will get kinky in season two of a television series called The New Girl.

Well I had to check that out because Carla Gugino is an actress who will do a risky scene, she did the lesbian rape scene with probable panty gag in Jaded, after all, one of only two scenes in the history of television with probable panty gags. Link to a vidcap from the scene showing the gag. (They're "probably" panty gags because they look like panties stuck in the women's mouths and in the Gugino scene, there wasn't a lot else out there on the beach to gag her with but her panties. It would be a certain panty gag if the whole scene had not been shot in extreme chairobscuro).

Reading the post, Gugino will play an executive that forces a subordinate to sign a contact that will "bind his body and his will" to her. The article describes this as "going all 50 Shades on him."

No. No, no and no. Two major problems here. One, doesn't sound very consensual -- sounds like straight-up abuse of power, whereas 50 Shades was all about the consensual -- and two, the genders are all wrong. The women who enjoyed 50 Shades enjoyed a fantasy about a woman submitting sexually to a man, not a fantasy about a man submitting sexually to a woman.

Let me be very clear here: there are women who enjoy fantasies of dominating men, and there are men who enjoy fantasies of being dominated by women, and that's fine. They are as entitled to their fantasies as anybody else is. I'm not entertaining any notions that maledom/femsub is the order of nature or other such bullcrap. It's all good.

But I am saying that the vast majority of 50 Shades readers like maledom/femsub themes, after all, that's what 50 Shades is, and they also don't care for femdom/malesub themes. After all, the popularity of 50 Shades sprang straight from romance readers ready for some hotter action. And while there are thousands and thousands of romance novels about bold pirates capturing spirited wenches and finding love instead of a quick roll in the captain's lounge, there a very, very few romance novels about bold pirate wenches capturing spirited young studs and finding love, etc.

That's because the romance readership doesn't like them. Romance novels, except for that explicit sex thing, have always slavishly followed their readers' tastes, which is why they are now by far the top selling variety of adult fiction. And their failure to get it on with the explicit maledom/femsub kink is why they have lost so many readers to erotic romance ebooks like Karg. (And, well, OK, 50 Shades as well. It has outsold Karg by ... a lot. I'm not at liberty to divulge numbers here, as it would be too embarrassing for the publishing industry, by which of course I mean "me." Not that any other ebook writers' numbers look that good next to 50 Shades.)

Now there is no reason for The New Girl not to chase after the relatively small demographic of women who like femdom/malesub kink, it's their show, they can do as they like.

But my suspicion is that they are introducing this "50 Shades" theme to attract more viewers (television is a numbers game after all) and if THAT'S their goal, they're doing it all wrong. They need to go after the big demographic that likes maledom/femsub themes if they want numbers.

I suspect the reason that they are doing it wrong is that they haven't caught up with the paradigm shift that 50 Shades represents. Most mainstream TV and movie producers will reflexively prefer a femdom/malesub theme over a maledom/femsub themes because they fear offending feminists, and women who are pro-feminism. And they think they can get away with it in terms of attracting viewers because they think anyone who likes anything kinky will like anything described as kinky. If you like bondage, you like nuns and schoolgirls and whipped cream and dwarves and, well, anything. Which is world-class dumb of them, but hey, there's a reason network television is hemorrhaging viewers every year, and it ain't intelligence.

Monday, September 17, 2012

Back to the Eighties: The Right Responds To 50 Shades With Lies

"Ladies! Ladies! Don't you realize you're constructing a false idol there? No, it's not the name of a new sex position, its ... never mind ..." (BTW, that's James Deen helping them construct the idol.) Image source: Sex and

I'm feeling the right wing crank up their anti-sex machine with regard to the success of 50 Shades of Gray. I've already written about the cheap attack on 50 Shades by an almost certainly fictional "expert" which was initially made on an obscure right wing blog. Now Fox News has got an actual "expert" on the attack, albeit in a different way, with more sophisticated techniques, in an article entitled How Women Made Porn Fashionable.

The interesting thing is that both articles make extensive use of lies and misdirection for their attacks. It's like lying has become a habit so engrained in the right that they use it whether they need it or not. So I thought I'd administer a good old-fashioned Straight Dope forums-style beatdown on this article right here on my blog.

To start with:
Women are consuming and endorsing porn such as ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ -- a book recognized as ‘mommy porn.’ Poorly written, it is not a how-to-manual and it’s not poetic erotica.

So it's not a how-to manual, and it's not poetic erotica (whatever that is) so it's porn. Never has the middle felt so excluded!

Then we get:

Pulp/romance novels transformed into a new genre embracing porn as literature - explicitly sexual scenes featuring bondage/discipline, dominance/submission and sadism/masochism

He's way oversimplifying to make his point here. Romance novels still exist. It's obvious that a lot of their readership have shifted over to the erotic romance genre, especially in ebook format, which is what 50 Shades is an example of. But erotic romances are not really the same thing as porn, either. I was EIGHT CHAPTERS into the Fifty Shades before Ana got so much as a kiss. Eight chapters! Who ever heard of porn that went eight chapters without any sexual action? 50 Shades is erotica, not porn, dude. Not that you know the difference, or care to.

More than 20 million copies have sold in the US (40 million worldwide), and it is yet another example of the way porn is becoming more than socially acceptable amongst women. Moreover, it is becoming an aspirational target for women.

Women and the media have linked consuming porn or behaving like a porn actress with instant money, fame, power, glamour, prestige, respectability and social acceptability. In other words, if you become a porn actress or behave like one, you will triumph with all of these things. Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian became famous and rich for making a sex tape, and they spun off empires of TV shows, fashion lines, perfumes and paid appearances. The message is: one leads to the other.

This is complete bullcrap. Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian did indeed make sex tapes and they were indeed leaked to the Internet, but so have many other women. Yet only Hilton, Kardashian and a few others got rich and famous. Why just them? Could it be that Hilton and Kardashian's sex tapes took off because they were ALREADY rich and famous and had the connections to make the media sit up and take notice? Why yes, I believe it could be that. You'd have to be a complete dumbass to think that making a sex tape all by its lonesome was the gateway to fame and fortune. Then again, this article is aimed at women who read FoxNews. So ... I guess warning them is probably a good idea.

Using sex for money and fame, women have found a new way to feel powerful and secure without a man or even necessarily a family – Octomom has openly become a porn actress and stripper.

I would really like to see some statistics that this is being done by women generally, which is how he phrased it. I'm betting the truth is, it's being done by a FEW women, and the rest are watching with an unholy mixture of glee, schadenfreude, and envy.

Mothers, too, are now sexualizing their daughters and dressing them up as sexual candy for the world.

Yet another totally unsupported assertion, save for a few media types. How 'bout some stats, dude? Most women I know think this sort of thing is ridiculous. This unsubstantiated bloviating is getting annoying, but then, that's is why I don't follow Fox anything anywhere.

Porn could never have become mainstream and socially acceptable without the support and endorsement by women.

I guessed you missed the 1970s and 1980s, when porn did exactly that, without the support and endorsement of women. It wasn't mommy that made XXX videos a billion dollar industry, it was daddy. Try to pay some attention to, well ... anything, dude.

And women and the media have linked consuming porn or behaving like a porn actress with instant money, fame, power, glamour, prestige, respectability and social acceptability. In other words, if you become a porn actress or behave like one, you will triumph with all of these things.

Yeah, that's why you see porn actresses on breakfast cereal boxes nowadays. "Wheaties will let you take on three guys at once without breaking a sweat, just like Mindi Boytoy!" Do you not ever check any of your thoughts against reality to see if they make any sense at all, dude?

Accordingly, girls are more fascinated and driven by the desire to become famous than they are to become an engineer, doctor or scientist: Kim Kardashian has 14 million followers on Twitter.

I would like to see some evidence that the set of women who have a realistic shot at becoming an engineer, doctor or scientist overlaps with the set of women who follow Kim Kardashian on Twitter to any degree.

The paradox is that women are becoming more educated than men as women surpass men in attendance and graduation rates – for every two men who get a college degree, three women will do also. But, women are failing to realize the dangers of falling for porn or promoting porn as the new fashionable profession and path to fame, riches and glory. This is the antithesis of female empowerment as MTV, Kim Kardashian and Octomom are teaching young girls to gain power over men by using sex.

So, they are getting the college degrees so they'll get all the good jobs, AND they are learning to gain power over men by using sex? We're TOTALLY boned, guys! And not in a good way! And ... who watches MTV any more? Is it even still on? Did this guy's brain set like cement back in the early 80s?

Women have now created false empty idols and have lost their real sense of self-worth, value and significance, replacing it with fleeting pseudo-power and artificial values and relationships, leaving them feeling unfulfilled and unsatisfied.

I had wondered what all those statues of Moloch were doing in the parking lot at Target, Walmart and most shopping centers ...

I appeal to women to beware of being deceived and betrayed into the world of porn and sexual objectification the same way that women were tricked into smoking cigarettes in the 1920s.

Let's see ... how did it go ... a woman who'll chew gum will smoke cigarettes, and a woman who smokes cigarettes will drink alcohol, and we all know what a woman who drinks alcohol will do ...

In April 1929, a PR expert, Edward Bernays, working for a US tobacco company, hired young models to march in the New York City parade and alerted the press that they were fighting for women’s rights by lighting "Torches of Freedom" as they lit up and smoked cigarettes. The media publicized the event and it helped to break the taboo against women smoking in public.

So that's why women took up smoking. I had thought they just wanted to get laid! (Some evidence that this PR event and others like it led to women smoking would be nice.)

Renowned physicist, psychiatrist, and psychoanalyst Dr. Jeffrey Satinover says porn is “a form of heroin, hundred times more powerful than before.”

Not believing a word of it. I'm betting this fellow works at one of those Institutes of Wacky Science that ideologues go to when they need an alarming quote. Had no idea porn was an opiate!

Forensic psychologist, M. Douglas Reed and renowned pharmacologist Candace Pert reveal that pornography is like a drug that triggers the brain to release a psychopharmacological flood of “epinephrine, testosterone, endorphins (endogenous morphine), oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin, and phenyethylamine,” which can lead to addiction and various other behavioral disorders.

More wacky science. But it would explain why I have to put a needleful of images into my arm every few hours. But at least here we are told that porn is LIKE a drug, not that it IS one as in the previous quote. I like the way endorphins are described as "endogenous morphine." Does my brain have to go to a dealer located somewhere disgusting like my intestines to get it, I wonder, and pay it off with ... ideas?

Gal Dines, professor of sociology and women's studies and chair of the American Studies Department at Wheelock College in Boston, has written about and researched the porn industry for over two decades. Professor Dines, author of “Pornland: How Porn Has Hijacked Our Sexuality,” believes porn is a public health issue with documented negative effects on young people, distorting "the way women and girls think about their bodies, their sexuality and their relationships."

I'm betting Professor Dines has some very strong opinions about how women and girls should think about their bodies, their sexuality and their relationships. Note the "public health issue" bit ... it's the approach that Catherine MacKinnon took to attack porn and try to get it banned back in the 80s. Still harping on the same old saw. Hmm, I sense a trend here.

Pornography is equally damaging to adult relationships and social bonds – men are struggling to develop close, intimate relationships with real women with some men now preferring porn to sex with an actual human being.

Because looking at images of other people doing something is just as much fun as doing it yourself. That's why no one bothers to go on vacation any more, too.

Bottom line: porn does not promote love or sex but rather cruelty and hatred to women, and so, while women continue to endorse and make porn fashionable or a new ideal, they are foolishly robbing themselves and undermining all of the positive strides and triumphs they have made in their quest for equality.

Bottom line: get those pillbox hats and white gloves on and go back to church ladies, or you won't be feminists any more! I'm pretty sure that's where this guy is headed. It's a sad day when pornish bloggers have to give political writers savage beatdowns for lying and misrepresentation, but I guess that is where the right has gone with its political discourse.

Now THIS is a bottom line worth looking at! Image source: Training of

Saturday, September 15, 2012

The Stir's Readers Know Their Bondage

An image of the mysterious bondage shopper. Image source: the AsiaOne forum.

For a long time on this blog I've been decrying the way mainstream media, particularly the fashion industry, use "bondage" to describe all sorts of things that clearly are not bondage. But there are a couple of heartening signs that people are catching on.

Somebody snapped a bunch of what appear to be cell phone pics of a scantily clad woman doing her shopping in a supermarket with her naked butt hanging out. It got picked up and described as an S&M outfit by the folks on the Asia One forum where it first appeared, then got picked up by The Stir and described as a "Fifty Shades of Gray Bondage Outfit."

The heartening part was the comments section of The Stir article, where readers were quick to point out that:

1) The outfit had nothing to do with Fifty Shades of Gray
2) The outfit had nothing to do with bondage, either, it was just a generic hooker kind of outfit.
3) Since all we saw of the outfit was the back side of the wearer, it could have been a man we were looking at.

To make things even more ironic, The Stir article was illustrated with a picture of a woman who was actually tied up.

I love it when I see readers keeping bloggers and media honest. Can you imagine the blowback, say, Cosmo would get if its articles always came with reader comments?

Of course, I rarely see such comments, because I am always right. Well almost always.

For the record, this is a naked woman, in bondage, in public. Thank you, Public Disgrace.

Friday, September 14, 2012

Women: Horny Trumps Disgust: Why The Human Race Exists, Really!

As a matter of fact, I AM feeling moderately less disgusted! Let's do it some more, I had no idea not being disgusted felt so very, very good! Image source: (the gorgeous Jewell Marceau in a video eloquently titled "The Duct Tape Shake."

IO9 is on a roll of late. Yesterday we told you about their article on hilarious unsexy erotic toys. (I can't believe I linked to the post it's DIRECTLY below this post! Oh, well.) Today they are reporting on research by Danish scientist that indicates that sexually aroused women are less easily disgusted than women who are not sexually aroused. Check it out here -- amazing, eh?

Now some commenters have observed that this is one of the least amazing facts ever discovered by science. But I think they missed a subtle point made in the test: that the sexually aroused women were less disgusted by tasks that were not sexual in nature, as well as tasks that had sexual elements. (For example, drinking a glass of water that had a fake plastic, but real-looking, insect in it.)

This could mean that for women sexual arousal is linked in some way with whatever part of the mind is responsible for disgust, and that treatments (chemicals, whatever) that reduce disgust may help non-orgasmic women become more orgasmic.

Like much of science that deals with the mind, especially the sexy parts of the mind, it's fascinating and kinda weird. No wonder I liked the article!

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Ye Olde Sex Toys

Over on I09, a site I usually go to in order to get my science fiction/science fact hits, they have an article entitled "Hilarious and Unsexy Historical Erotic Toys." The article really delivers what its title promises: the toys are hilarious in their clumsy attempts to be sexy, and completely unsexy by modern standards. Maybe in the day when a glimpse of a stockinged ankle was major boner material they were something, but by modern standards, they are hilariously lame. Check it out, it's interesting and fun, even with the stupid stars. (The article is censored, with stars blocking out the hilariously unsexy genitals and nipples of the images on the toys, Gawker claiming that it is a "family company.")

For the record: companies may be owned and run by families, but they are not people, hence can't be "family companies." They're just machines for making money. Nothing wrong with that, unless you start letting them sway elections with huge cash outlays (see: "machines for making money") under the misapprehension that they are people and have free speech rights. Now THAT would be hilariously stupid!

"Listen here, Miss Corporation, you have the same right to speech that any other corporation has: the right to remain silent!" Image source: Fucking

Alternate caption: We'll go with the big boys' toys!

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

An Expressive Blowjob

"Well, I studied philosophy for four years, and now look at me, a slavegirl, naked, on my knees, wearing armbinders and sucking some guy's cock 'cause he told me to. Well, at least I am wonderfully well equipped to be philosophical about it!" Image source: Public

Really, the expression on this woman's face is fascinating. Most porn models being photographed with a cock in their mouths tend to look up at the guy attached to the cock with their eyes wide, wide open. This woman is looking up at the guy, but her expression is more guarded. It's like, "Yes, I'm naked, I'm bound and I'm on my knees before you, and I've got your cock in my mouth ... but I'm watching you, buddy!"

Monday, September 10, 2012

Another Network Toys With Wonder Woman

What's this? Have I scored advance publicity photos of a new Wonder Woman TV series? Stay tuned! Image source: to be revealed later!

The Jezebel blog has a report out that a new Wonder Woman television series may be in the offing. Execs at the CW television network are reportedly looking hard at a pilot for the series.

The news probably comes as bittersweet news to fans of Wonder Woman. So many movie and TV execs have toyed with their hopes so many times, and left them dashed so many times in the decades since the great Lynda Carter series in the 1980s. Most notably, a David E. Kelley Wonder Woman pilot got made and then rejected by NBC, much to the dismay of fans. However, in that case the script was so badly written that it left the folks at Topless Robot wondering if they had hired some bum off the street to do the actual scriptwriting.

It would be great to have a Wonder Woman show on TV again, if only for purposes of snarkery. Given the snakebit history of attempts to revive the Wonder Woman franchise, we can only hope that somewhere out there on the Web some creative people are truly fulfilling the potential of a female Amazonian superheroine. In fact, I have written an article showing how even mainstream media might fulfill her potential.

Bound and gagged, The Superheroine Who Somewhat Resembles Wonder Woman But Is DEFINITELY Not Wonder Woman could only watch while her lovely young assistant was stripped, forced into a straightjacket, and then vigorously minioned by two minions at once! Image source: Well I guess there ARE web people who are exploring that Amazonian superheroine dynamic, in this case, the good folks at Sex and And yes, the pic at the top of the page comes from the same source. Not that I fooled anybody ... heh.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Cyclops And The Slave Girls -- WTF Through The Roof!

Two frames from Cyclops and the Slavegirls, a video that has to be seen to be believed.

Cyclops and the Slave Girls is a dailymotion video that has me completely puzzled. Its theme seems to be cannibalism (the sexual fetish) and/or vore (another sexual fetish that involves being literally eaten, though typically by very large animals). It's about four beautiful, sexy, topless slavegirls who get eaten by a cyclops, after being roasted alive. You can find it here.

Well it's definitely not my cuppa, but that's OK, plenty of things aren't my cuppa, and that's not what puzzles me about the video.

What puzzles me is the enormous amount of trouble that Cine Lux went to through to create the video, and the curious animation technique he used. Take a look at the two images at the top of the post here. Apparently, he used photos of naked models ... they're in the credits, which he photoshopped a lot and then ... distorted the features of so that their expression ... varies. Its a primitive form of animation, perhaps the most primitive form, and it's not at all attractive. Their expressions consist of two different kinds of unattractive grimaces, and yes, their breasts bobble up and down in time with the changes in their facial expressions.

Not just occasionally. Constantly. Like I said, not attractive, though technically I suppose it is a step up from previous films by Cine Lux, where they simply pasted cut out photos of the actresses with no attempt to animate their features as they spoke via word balloon.

The video spends a lot of time setting up the characters and backgrounds of the three hotties of the story, given that the whole point of the film is that they are cooked alive and then eaten by the cyclops. It starts out as a story of slavegirls in the ancient world and turns into … well .. the bulk of the film consists of vore/cannibalism porn. These scenes are not all that horrific, as the animation is so crude and not at all disgusting, compared to what it might have been. Plus the slavegirls are witty right up til the end.

That's another thing, the dialogue is witty in spots and generally kinda sharp. There's a clear humorous intent to the film along with the cannibalism. Though I suppose if you were sexually aroused by cannibalism, it might be necessary to cultivate a sense of humor. It looks like a children's cartoon created by a madman.

All of this, especially the bizarre animation technique, combines to create a tremendous WTF factor for the video. It's mind boggling. Watch it, at least for a few moments. I didn't watch all of it, I did a lot of skimming, cause the cannibalism part is boring if you are not into cannibalism.

The other thing is, the film is so labor intensive. He had to edit it on a frame-by-frame basis. (I don't know that the creator of the film is male, the credits imply a huge team of people made the film, but I don't buy it for an instant.) It must have taken a log time to put the elements together and get the film moving. Which is probably why it moves at a snail's pace. There are easier ways of achieving much more sophisticated animations.

"With an impressive name like Cine Lux, this has to be a good movie I'm in! They said I'd have lots of sizzling scenes, too!" Image source:

Friday, September 7, 2012

Nice Kinky Spoof From ... The Daily KOS?

"My turn to be the conservative rape fantasist next! And I'll be using the TENS unit on you! Oooh!" Image source: Sex and

One of the places where humor is commonplace but rarely funny is politics. Most of the time, the humor doesn't have to be all that FUNNY so long as it advances the views of one political group or another. So I was more than a little astonished to find in The Daily KOS, a left-wing/progressive blog, a post that was actually funny.

The post is a bit of friendly advice to conservatives, advising them it's just fine that they are kinky, but that their kind seems to be nonconsensual fantasies ... which are fine, the whole Force Fantasy thing so long as both parties know what's going on and consent to it.

But the conservatives seek to force their views on women who do not consent to their fantasies of what sex and rape are. (Such as the one about women's bodies preventing pregnancy if rape is "legitimate."

It's definitely left wing of course, not everyone's cuppa, but there's a nice little point to it that gives it some edge.

Thursday, September 6, 2012

BDSM Sex Club Discovered In Historic Louisvile, Kentucky

Him: "This is SO MUCH fun! We shouldn't keep it to ourselves, we should share it around. Start a club or somethin'."
Her: "Mmmmgh!"
Him: "I knew you'd see things my way!

Image source: Fucking

Deep in the bowels of Louisville Kentucky, historic building renovators have discovered a secret BDSM sex club hidden beneath the very streets of downtown. An entrance under the basement of a disused historic building leads two stories beneath the streets of downtown.

The creepy, dingy underlit club, unused for decades, features a rack and some really badly decomposed furniture, and some of the most ugly-ass painting I have ever seen on it's wall. Really, check out the story, if there were ever paintings that were designed to put you OUT of the mood for sex of ANY kind, these are it. If I walked into a Gorean paga tavern and saw art like that I'd walk right out and I wouldn't stop walking til I had reached the docks and sailed.

I'll stick with this guy's art, thankyewverymuch. Or even photos like the one up top.

The club started back in the 1970s and continued to the 1990s. "We got the paintings because the basement location just was not dingy and forbidding enough on its own," said a nonexistent former club member. Well no one said, that, I made it up. SOMEBODY needed to say it.

Monday, September 3, 2012

Labor Day Piano Lesson

"No, no! Please ... not Brahms' Sonata No. 3 in F Minor!"* Image source: Whipped Ass.

It's Labor Day, and we honor you for laboring. You work hard to buy those piano lessons for your wife ... but they're worth it!

Happy Labor Day!

*Brahms Sonata No. 3 in F Minor is noted for forcing the pianist to play with her hands placed at opposite ends of the keyboard a lot. Painful, in this case!

Sunday, September 2, 2012

Jenna Louise Coleman Part 2: Even More Naked, Fucked and Tied or ... Even More Cloned?

The incredible two-headed TV/porn star! On the left, the actress who'll be playing Dr. Who's new gorgeous young associate, Jenna Louise Coleman, and on the right, Melissa Jacob, porn star. Image source: left, publicity photo, on the right,wired

So I've noticed that there are a lot of people reading my story about Jenna Louise Coleman's celebrity clone from In my previous story I did not identify the clone, and I didn't take note of the really striking resemblance of Coleman to her clone, Melissa Jacob. As you can see from the image above, remarkably similar. this clone has not deviated much from the original at all in appearance, although the porny tendencies of celebrity clones are fully realized here. (See below.)

Ever wonder what Jenna Louise Coleman would like like if she were stripped naked, tied to a table, ball gagged and relentlessly molested by a naked blonde woman? Probably a lot like this, as this is her celebrity clone, Melissa Jacob. Image source: Wired

Jacob is a former Penthouse Pet and a former Hustler centerfold, and has done several shoots for She holds a degree in accounting and a certificate in esthetics (a branch of philosophy dealing with beauty and the beautiful. Hmm, judging from her photos, she probably was able to crib for the course just by looking in a mirror). No, I'm not kidding. She has a long term relationship with a man and that probably has something to do with the fact that she will do lesbian sex, sexual bondage, and sex toy play, but will not have sex with men.

Jacobs gets along VERY well with machines, however, in this case giving us a pretty good idea what Jenna Louise Coleman would look like if she were tied to a chair at wrists and ankles and subjected to a piston-driven dildo and a vibrator at the same time, while wearing nipple clamps. This is mad science at its best! Image source: Fucking

Clearly, the unknown mad scientist who cloned Melissa Jacob (possibly this fellow, he looks the type) did a great job, but also wanted to cover his tracks, as Coleman is a Brit while Jacob hails from California ... literally a world apart. Coleman attended school in England where she held the suspiciously porny title of Head Girl, though apparently it is NOT what it sounds like it is. A shame.

Coleman is a familiar face in England, having played in a number of British soap operas, television shows and movies. She's probably best known in the United States for her role as Connie in "Captain America, The First Avenger." But I suspect Coleman's role as Oswin in the upcoming season of Doctor Who will bring her much more attention in the United States.

In an early episode of Dr. Who, Oswin shows some gumption by knocking over a Dalek and destroying it by straddling it and covering its destructor nozzle with her pussy, despite being naked, ball gagged and tied by the Dalek's lesbian cadre of super minions ... wait ... this just in ... that's actually Melissa Jacob in a scene from Public Disgrace. Well ... a natural mistake to make!

Of course, it COULD be that Coleman and Jacob are not clones at all, just actresses who happen to look very much like one another despite their very different birthplaces, identified as clones by some idiot blogger based on their superficial resemblance to one another. But on a planet with a mere seven billion human beings inhabiting it, what are the odds of that happening? You can see why I like my celebrity clone theory!

Saturday, September 1, 2012

A Brilliant Analysis of Fifty Shades Of Gray From Feministing

"Um, didn't we, in our negotiations, agree to three weights per nipple clamp? I'm pretty sure it's right there in Section B, Paragraph 3 ..." Image source:

I'm fascinated by the 50 Shades of Gray phenomenon, that's why I follow the news media about it. Otherwise I couldn't manage it, because by FAR the majority if the articles I find are absolute dreck. I've learned to scan and dismiss them in seconds.

So you can imagine my pleasure when I find a really good, insightful article, like the one I found on Obsidian Wings months ago, or the one I found on Alternet more recently.

I've found another really great analysis of 50 Shades of Gray on the Feministing Community site, entitled "Unconventional Sex Ed Lessons from 50 Shades of Gray". It's written by Mimi Arbeit, a feminist educator who teaches sex education to teens. She says she expected to find the book a huge disappointment because of all that she'd heard about it, but was pleasantly surprised by it, finding it a welcome change from the dominant themes about sex and romance in the media.

By that she means the book covers a lot of things that other books do not. Most importantly, Ana and Christian communicate clearly and honestly with one another about sex throughout their relationship. Christian is always careful to get Ana's informed consent before he has any kind of sex with her. They discuss and plan for contraception before they have sex. And the book directly and powerfully portrays Ana's experiences of sexual pleasure and desire. As I've noted repeatedly, James does a REALLY good job of conveying how much Ana and Christian enjoy their sex play.

Wildly popular books about sex read by teens NEVER have any of this stuff, says Arbeit, so she is enormously grateful to see an erotic romance that mentions all of the lessons she is trying to instill in her teen students, whose media experience does not include ANY of it.

Mind you, Arbeit's opinion of the book is not wholly positive -- she says she could just as easily write a list of ten things she finds problematical about the book, and I believe her. But she is glad of the book as a chance to open up a dialog which allows her to convey the importance of some of these themes to her teen students. And I think that's what opens her up to the positive aspects of the books that a lot of other readers missed. She saw what was there because her experience teaching teens had sharpened her eye to it.

Sadly, Arbeit is one of the relatively few non-romance reviewers of the books who has the guts to say they like elements of it. Most non-romance reviewers project a sort of arrogant, snotty attitude, often confessing that they read very little of the book or that they did not read it at all, following up by condemning it wholesale on the basis of all the stuff they did not read. Clearly, such reviews are all about confirming their status of not being the sort of person who reads 50 Shades of Gray or anything like it, rather than an honest examination of the book.

Here's a great example of what I'm talking about, a post to a fantasy message board called "The Black Gate by someone named "Theo." A choice quote:

So does 50 Shades of Grey go too far? Not on the surface, as according to its description it is little more than John Norman’s Gor brought back to Earth, minus the sword battles and the awesome tarn birds. And it’s not a question I can legitimately even try to answer, since I haven’t read 50 Shades of Grey, nor do I have any intention of doing so.

Didn't read it, so of course he makes a completely wrong comparison of 50 Shades with the Gor novels, which as a guy who read 20 or so of the Gor novels, the slavery was of the distinctly nonconsensual kind (the Gorean slaves just loved it because they were natural born slavegirls) which makes it WAAAAAY different than 50 Shades, which is all about the consensual.

But then Theo goes and accuses 50 Shades of being stealth pedophilia, based on the accusations of an anonymous poster on another message board who relates the story of a purported child psychologist who read the book and decided that Ana is written as a 12-year-old for some reason, possibly the "oh my!"s "Inner goddesses" and suchlike. It smells like one of those classic put-up jobs with a made-up friend who is an authority (child psychologist) is used to attack something to make it seem awful (pedophile porn) with vague evidence (even though Ana is identified as a twenty-one year old college grad, she's "written as a child") hoping it will stick.

Fortunately, a couple of posters on the Black Gate board who responded saw this piece of shit for what it was and gave it a thorough going-over.

To be honest, the Black Gate post is about an order of magnitude worse than any of the other posts which have dissed the book. But there are still plenty who will hate it based on a verbal description and a lot of social prejudice. You can see why I liked the "Unconventional Sex Ed Lessons" article so much ... it was a real breath of fresh air compared to much of what I read on the topic. And "Unconventional Lessons" is a real antidote to the dreck post from the Black Gate.