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Thursday, March 14, 2013

For The Record: Wonder Woman Is Not A Silicon-Enhanced Pornstar


C'mon, this is so unrealistic! Wonder Woman does NOT wear high heels as part of her costume! Image source: Some tumblr site. Don't know who did the art, but Rowan did the color work.

I've seen a variety of images of Wonder Woman in various pornish situation on the Interwebs, and I've developed an aesthete about them: I like the ones where Wonder Woman actually LOOKS like Wonder Woman a lot more than I like the ones where she does not. Specifically, I don't like the ones where Wonder Woman looks like a pornstar who has never done a pushup in her life, who has bought a couple of gallons of silicon to bring her breasts up to ludicrous size. (See above.)

There are MANY such illustrations on the Web, and my problem with them is that they simply do not look like the buff fighting woman that Wonder Woman is supposed to be. I know, the basic idea is "Wouldn't it be great if Wonder Woman were naked, bound and (fill in the blank)?" But then the artist goes on to think, "And wouldn't it be great if Wonder Woman had huge breasts and a big ass, you know, a little meat on her bones, and big puffy lips and huge round eyes?" And that's where the artists screw up, because the resulting image doesn't LOOK like Wonder Woman, she looks like a stripper/pornstar wearing a Wonder Woman outfit. And that, as we all know, is Power Girl! And it AIN'T ... Wonder Woman!


Power Girl! And not a porny fantasy image, but a canonical image from the actual comic. She really DOES have a butt on her chest! Image source: the Interwebs.

What makes this phenomenon PARTICULARLY annoying is that Wonder Woman having a nice, big rack is canon. She's not one of those B-cup superheroines. She's always been portrayed as filling out her boustier nicely, in comics and on TV. (Linda Carter being the case in point, we will not speak of the Cathy Rigby Wonder Woman!)

But some guys want her to fill it out WAAAAY past normal, and frankly, the image at the top is far from the most extreme example I've seen. I suppose if you have a big breast fetish, by which I mean a ludicrously big breast fetish, you gotta make Wonder Woman look like she's smuggling basketballs in her boustier to make her seem sexy to you, but really, for most people, past a certain point breasts don't look sexy, they look deformed.

Plus, Wonder Woman is buff, she's an Amazon for cryin' out loud, she doesn't have a pencil neck or twiglike arms or (see above) tiny, tiny feet. She doesn't have excess fat on her hips or her butt. She doesn't necessarily have to look like a damn body builder, but at LEAST like a gymnast.


Poor Diana. All her enemies have the exact same idea for her once she's captured. But note: this Wonder Woman is at least built realistically. Big breasts, but not ludicrously big. Is that too much to ask? Don't ask! Image source: the Antileaf website, according the watermark. All sorts of goodies to check out there.

1 comment:

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