"Leather diaper epic? Yah, I think I can handle it!" Image source: vidcap of Dwayne Johnson in "The Scorpion King."
The news feeds are abuzz with word that a new Hercules movie will be coming out, directed by Brett Ratner and starring Dwayne Johnson of "Scorpion King" fame. I like the casting of Johnson for the lead, he has the looks for the role of Hercules and he has a flair for comedy, maybe they are planning to bring back the lighthearted feel that made the original sword and sandal epics so much fun. (I honestly doubt this, the modern standards for violence and bloodshed are too compelling and will just suck the lightheartedness right out of the movie. It's ultimately why I don't like Spartacus despite all the sexy, sexy slavegirls.)
But the real question for this blog is, of course, how will the slavegirl imagery be handled? As the author of Hottitude of Servitude: Slavegirls In the Movies and On TV, I am the greatest authority on this topic, possibly because I'm the only one. I do hope some kind soul will send Brett Ratner and his production designer copies of the book so they could be informed. I'll be they'd be crestfallen if they were to miss the chance to read "Hottitude of Servitude."
I thought of a variety of ways I could describe the probable costuming that will exist in the movie. But really, a series of lightly captioned pictures should do the trick.
Dream of this. Never gonna happen, of course ... but you CAN dream! If there's any slave girl sex, you can be just about certain it will be "tasteful" and won't involve any bondage. Or, probably, onscreen nudity. Image source: Whipped Ass.com.
Hope for this. The nudity is unlikely, but possible, after all, Spartacus has shown just how nicely naked slavegirls can enliven a sword and sandal epic. Much more likely will be a thong and a tiny bra or pasties to cover the nipples for family considerations. Image source: Found it on Crueltimur's gallery, no idea who created it, but it's a fine piece of art, somebody let me know if you know.
Expect this. Because, c'mon. Hollywood is running a good fifty years behind its audiences nowadays. Image source: vidcap from the 1973 film "The Amazons," which to be fair has some VERY tasty naked slavegirls elsewhere in the film. Including lesbian wrassing.