First Window Dresser: "Hey, this dummy just mmphed at me!"
Second Window Dresser: "Yah, they got chips now, they can make all kinds of noises to attract customers. Just stick it in the window and it'll be fine!"
Image source: Device Bondage.com
Recommended music for this article: Showroom Dummies by Senor Coconut.
Found a story about the furor aroused by a display of a mannequin in bondage in the window of an adult novelty shop in the hotbed of depravity known only as Reading, Pennsylvania. I am shocked, shocked, that the bluenoses of Reading are so desperate for sexual things to disapprove of that they must look in sex shop windows to find them. I can imagine the rants that went on behind the scenes as the Philadelphia Fox affiliate, desperate for something resembling news, but isn't really news, as the Fox News station battened on this story:
FOX AFFILIATE COMMENTATOR: "Harrumph! The dangers that bondage mannequins pose to the young and impressionable of every age have been for far too long overlooked! Sure, mannequins SEEM harmless, acting all unable to move and voiceless, but believe me, there's something going on behind those innocent-looking cardboard exteriors! It's a known fact that no mannequin has ever owned a gun! Some say they are apolitical, I say, prove they are NOT commies! And of course, they are gender-confused by nature ... even clearly female mannequins are called "mannequins" not "womannequins" as would only be right! I shall do my riding on the BB&O railroad from now on!"
No comments:
Post a Comment