Thursday, January 3, 2013

Why Can't WE Have Commercials Like This?

THIS is bondage! And yet ... no reason it couldn't be FASHION bondage! Image source: Public

So, flying monkeys found an INCREDIBLE commercial for Axe body spray from France recently. A nice little update of the damsel in distress cliche for the era of 50 Shades of Grey. It's freaking hilarious, and sexy, too. But mostly, hilarious! I know that Axe commercials generally get the ladies at in full twisty-panty mode, but damn, there was some wit and intelligence going on in that commercial. Keep chopping away, Axe!

Also, a bit of end-of-the-year silliness from the fashion industry, a survey of bondage-inspired fashions from 2012 entitled Fifty Shades Of 2012: Year Of The Bondage-Inspired Outfit on, which proves conclusively that all a garment needs is black coloration and one or more straps to get labelled "bondage-inspired." Note that there are no fashions that involve anything being, well, um ... bound to anything else. Proof positive that the fashion industry knows diddly about bondage.

Many bondage ties you see on this site wouldn't work on a runway because with her legs tied to things, the model can't really walk. But it doesn't HAVE to be that way. This is the same model in the same bondage as at the top of the page, she's standing and can walk easily, because her legs aren't fettered. She wears a ring gag, a leather collar, a leash, a rope breast harness and her hands are tied. She's in bondage, and looks it! Why can't fashion designers come up with inspired ways of interpreting actual bondage gear and ties rather than putting black stripes on a shirt, or otherwise create completely lame designs? Is this the age of 50 Shades of Grey or not? Image source: Public

The slideshow features Anne Hathaway, Kim Kardashian, Rihanna, Krysten Ritter, Krysten Stewart, Lea Michelle, Carmen Electra, Katy Perry, Stacy Keibler, Ke$ha, Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus, Nicki Minaj, Paris Hilton, Katie Price and of course, Madonna, none of whom is tied or bound or chained in any way. Frankly, for many of the images, if a fashion blog had not informed me that they were bondage-inspired outfits, I would have had no idea.

Here's a Pinterest board that the flying monkeys found that has actual bondage imagery, just to get the bad taste out of your mind. And of course, our image up top makes the point. Bondage be bondage, bitches!

Here's another bondage model, in what's practically a fashion runway scenario. She wears a rope harness, her hands are tied behind her back, and she is paraded before a crowd of seated individuals while wearing a delightful blue negligee. True, she has a handler showing her around, but that could work in a runway environment very well, and is not needed anyway. Of course, no reason designers should restrict themselves to rope or exactly copy shibari harness rigs ... but they can do a LOT more to be bondage-y than they do. Image source: Public

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